A Lost Love

The girl and the boy met four years back. Their first meeting was nothing short of a world war. The boy thought that the girl was a little too over friendly while the girl felt that the boy had some serious attitude issues. They met at an office meeting, exchanged some formal pleasantries just to maintain the decorum but did not like each other at all.

Days passed and turned into weeks, which soon turned into months. They both forgot about each other and got busy with their respective work schedules. Then one winter morning, the girl’s phone beeped and she was more than surprised to see a message from the boy. It was work related. They started talking and discussing the issue. They both did not know what that one simple innocent message had in store for them.

The conversation that had started on a formal official note soon turned into getting to know each other more. Thus started a lifelong unbreakable friendship. They would talk for hours together. They could talk about anything and everything under the sun. They would discuss their families, their work, their friends and their foes. They knew that they could count on each other to be there when needed. They could fall back on each other in times of emergencies. From downright hating each other, they became best friends.

The girl’s husband knew of the strong bond that the boy and the girl shared and it kept him relieved that there was someone who would take care of his wife as he was far away from her. Together, the three were a riot. They cracked the dirtiest jokes and laughed out loud at the silliest of them. When the three met together, it was nothing but fun and laughter. They were the loudest in the crowd.

But society did not approve of this setup. The boy moved away and they do not meet anymore. They do not even talk to each other anymore. It has been more than two years that they have seen each other. They have stopped exchanging emails or phone call or messages. But they still remember each other’s birthdays and anniversaries. They wish each other in their heart and say a silent prayer every day hoping that the other one is happy, safe and sound wherever they are.

The husband sees the girl’s pain each day and he knows that she misses her best friend every day. He feels sad that he cannot do much about this situation. But he has never tried to replace her best friend. She is thankful to have such a loving and understanding husband in her life. She is also thankful to have met her best friend, although having him around would have made things better. Knowing that he is in a happy place makes her happy too.

So I leave you with the lyrics from a song,

Umra Bhar Ka Saath De Jo
Kyun Wohi Pyaar Ho.
Kyun Na Mitt Ke Jo Fanaa Ho
Woh Bhi Pyaar Ho.

(One that stays with you all your life why is only that love. One that sacrifices itself for the other is also a form of love).

Love and relationships are complicated. Cherish what you have and value the people you have. You never know what the future holds for you.

This post is a part of the blog train started by Jasmeet of http://www.mommyvoyage.comand Anchal of http://www.themumstory.com/. They have networked to bring together moms to share their take on Love and Relationships in this month of Love .

I am grateful to Ankita Raj who blogs at https://caringmommadiaries.wordpress.com, for introducing me to the blog train.

I now let the train pass from my station and reach yet another wonderful place on Sagarika Das’s blog at https://sagarikapodder.wordpress.com

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Letter of love – to my beloved.

I am thrilled to be participating in a five day “LOL-a-thon” organized by “The Momsteins”. Join us to read some wonderful letters written by 25 cool bloggers. Stay around to read some amazing letters coming up.

Today’s prompt is “letters of love- to your beloved.”

To the love of my life
It took me more than an hour to think of what to write to you. It is not because I do not have anything to say. It is because I have too much to say but I do not know where to start.

We first met in 2009 and we started off as friends. I do not even remember when that friendship turned into love. I remember proposing you via messaging one day, after you had dropped me off to my friend’s place. You did not reply for a full two and a half hours. I was so worried. I thought I had lost the friend also in you. I eventually found out you were stuck in traffic and had not checked your phone. You never proposed me and me being my usual hyper self had no time to wait. 🤣🤣

And then started a cross country love story. Me being from the north of the country and you being from the south, I knew from the beginning itself that we were bound to have problems in getting our relationship accepted by our families, in getting used to each other’s cultures, traditions, food, dressing sense and pretty much everything else. Have you noticed how I’ve perfected my dosa making skills over the years?? 😂

You have stood next to me like a rock over the years. You supported every decision of mine, well almost every one of them. When I decided to suddenly quit my job and study, when I decided to streak my hair red, when I kept adding to my piercing and tattoos collection and even helped me out with the designs.

Yes, sometimes I don’t like you. You are messy and unorganized. You will never put back your clothes into your cupboard the way you took them out and I’ve to keep picking up things after you. You sometimes go into “selective hearing coma” and end up either repeating what I just said or asking me a question about that same topic a minute later. I know you do not listen to everything I say but you do listen to everything important that I say.

You are a lucky guy to have found me. 😂😎 And I know someone up there is very very happy with whatever you did in your past life that you found me. I’m too good to be true. And I’ll continue to be so. Please do continue to love me and cherish me all your life. I’ll try and do the same.

Also, please get milk and curd on your way home just like you do everyday.
😂 😂 😂 😂 (A blogger friend has probably written this in her letter too. Totally copying the idea from her 🤣🤣🤣).

I would like to thank Priyanka for introducing me. You can read her post here https://mommynshanaya.wordpress.com

I would also like to introduce my fellow blogger Lohitha. You can read her wonderful post on the prompt here https://somebeautifulsmiles.wordpress.com

Letters of Love- to myself

I am thrilled to be participating in a five day “LOL-a-thon” organized by “The Momsteins”. Join us to read some wonderful letters written by 25 cool bloggers. Stay around to read some amazing letters coming up.

Today’s prompt is “letters of love- to your older or younger self”.

Here I am, writing a letter to myself. I had never thought I would do so, but I guess my blogging experience had some other plans for me. So I thought about it really hard whether I should write to the younger Pooja or the older Pooja. The younger one has made many mistakes, some that I regret even today. I have taken decisions, which were not right then and are still not right. I have learnt lessons from these wrong decisions but that regret is still there. But then, there is nothing that I can do about them. It is in the past now. My future though is still ahead of me. And there are still many years left in my life (hopefully) where I can bring about some changes. Therefore I shall be addressing this letter to the future Pooja.

Dear Pooja from the future,

I hope you have aged gracefully and beautifully. I hope you have stopped coloring your grey hair and have accepted them as a part of your growing up. I hope those greys shine away to glory when you sit down in the sun on your balcony with your coffee by your side and enjoying your favorite book. I hope you also have a huge pile of books that are still waiting to be touched. I hope your wrinkles talk about all the smiles and laughter you have shared with your family and friends. I hope your eyes still shut completely when you laugh. I hope the spots on your face have only added to your beauty. I hope you are more in love with yourself than you are right now.

I hope you are still best friends and still in love with your darling husband and he is right there next to you enjoying the sun but not reading anything. You couldn’t manage to get him also to enjoy books? That’s ok. You tried. He probably enjoys you enjoying your books more than reading them himself. I hope you guys have a dog or maybe more by your side, giving you company too.

I hope Miraya has grown up to be a kind, caring and a loving lady. Is she already married too? Do not force her if she still has not chosen to do so. I hope you respect her choices as an individual. Has she colored her hair green? Oh, that’s ok, remember that’s her choice. Plus it is your favorite color. You have raised her well. Have faith in her. She will not do anything to bring harm to you or herself. Besides, you will always be there by her side to support her when she needs it and asks for it.

I hope your home is comfortable. It doesn’t matter whether it is big or small but I hope it is filled with lots of sunshine, smiles and warm hugs. Is it already filled with grandkids running around? I hope your home is still the “go to place” for all your friends. I hope you still have loads of parties and people still love the food you make with love. I hope you are still enjoying good health even with those tequila shots competitions that you still compete at with your crazy bunch of friends.

I hope you are still as fun as you used to be when you were young. I hope you have some regrets from your past so that you do not commit those mistakes again. I hope you learn from the younger Pooja and become a better person. I hope your family and friends are proud of you. I hope you are proud of yourself. I hope you love yourself even more as you age. An empty vessel cannot provide any food to others. So fill yourself with love, laughter and genuine happiness which shall then spill over in abundance to all those around you.

Stay the same babe. Be your own favorite, always. Be you.

I would like to thank Pavneet for introducing me. You can read her post here https://vintage-mommy.com

I would also like to introduce my fellow blogger Alpana. You can read her wonderful post on the prompt here http://mothersgurukul.com/

Letters of love – to your neighbor

I am thrilled to be participating in a five day “LOL-a-thon” organized by “The Momsteins”. Join us to read some wonderful letters written by 25 cool bloggers. Stay around to read some amazing letters coming up.

Today’s prompt is “letters of love- to your neighbor”.

Dear Neighbor… in bed,

My dearest little neighbor in bed, sleeping oh so peacefully, let me begin by saying, I love you. I do say this too often, right? I know, every mother does. And those reading this right now, agree with me and are probably smiling right now.

Your daddy used to be my neighbor in bed till 29th November 2015 when we found out that you had already started forming inside me. Since then, you have taken up that space your father and me and we are so glad you have done so. Since that day, you have always been by my side. I have felt you grow inside me. I felt you move and kick around inside me. I felt your hiccups inside me. The day the doctor showed us your little heart beating on that screen, I can never put down in words my feelings from that day. No matter how hard I try, no matter how many dictionaries I open, no matter how many writing applications I try, I will never be able to describe how it felt. I will tell you this many times till you grow up and yourself decide to form life inside you. Maybe that day you will finally understand what exactly I felt that day.

You came into our lives on 17th July 2016 and since then you have been my actual physical neighbor in bed. Someone who cries at nights, earlier due to hunger and now due to dreams probably. I have fed you, comforted you and patted you back to sleep. I have been kicked by you, woken up with your face or your feet or your bum against my face. I have told you stories, some real and some imaginary. I have made your uncles and aunts sit on zebras and giraffes and walk around in boots covered with penguin and panda designs. These are some of the animals you recognize and sometimes want stories made around them. Your father has made imaginary stories about crocodiles and cockroaches because you wanted to. You are his neighbor in bed too after all.

My darling neighbor in bed let me tell you, you are a beautiful child who has nothing but love to offer to everyone. I see you going and shaking hands with children in the vegetable market. I have seen you shower smaller children in the park with your hugs and kisses. It makes my heart swell with pride that I made you. I created you from scratch. Well yes, biologically your father helped too but then I would like to take maximum credit for bringing such a beautiful baby into this world. Stay the same my girl. Be kind, be generous, and be compassionate. The world might not always reciprocate your feelings. Do not be disheartened. Give them one more chance and if they still hurt you, keep your head high and walk away. (I will go beat them up meanwhile, don’t you worry).

My sweet little neighbor, Mumma, and papa are super happy to have you in our lives. I thank God every single day for giving me a chance to be your mother, for giving me this opportunity to try and raise you into a good human being. Yes, I know I sometimes scream at you during the day. I might have even hit you once in a while. (Those of you judging me by reading this, I have never ever hit her very hard, and you can judge me all you want). As you lie here in bed next to me, dreaming away to glory, let me apologize to you for that. I never meant to hurt you in any way but I am human too. And sometimes, your crankiness and clinginess become a little too much to handle. I know you also have a reason for your erratic behavior but I just sometimes fail to understand it and I get flustered. I know you understand me my sweet child and you forgive and forget immediately. Stay the same baby.

So my dearest neighbor in bed, you might someday move out of our bed and go lie down in your bed, but you will never move out of our hearts. You are an irreplaceable part of us. We love you to all the farthest galaxies and back. Till you move away, let me just snuggle some more with my squishy soft neighbor and dream away.

I would like to thank Surabhi for introducing me. You can read her post here http://www.pearlncaramel.winkl.co

I would also like to introduce my fellow blogger Neha. You can read her wonderful post on the prompt here bloggifiedmom@wordpress.com

Letters of Love- to my SSCs

I am thrilled to be participating in a five day “LOL-a-thon” organized by “The Momsteins”. Join us to read some wonderful letters written by 26 cool bloggers. Stay around to read some amazing letters coming up.

Today’s prompt is “letters of love- to an inanimate object”.

Dear SSCs

Wondering what that short form is all about. Well, read on and you will figure it out.

So dear SSCs,

We were such good friends. We fit like a glove. We were best buddies. We did everything together. We ate together, worked together and slept together. We were madly in love with each other. We were inseparable.

You were there when I excelled my school exams. You were there when I won all the competitions that were held in school or even the inter-school competitions. You had my back when I did not win something that I deserved. You stayed with me through school farewell too. Oh, I still miss that day when we said goodbye to all our friends.

We went on dates together. You were there when I met my so-called “first love”. You were there when I had my first heartbreak. You helped me wipe my tears. You gave me warmth when I needed it the most. You helped me stay dry in those rains. You were there when the cold winter breeze was freezing me. You protected me from the harsh summer sun. You were there during our beautiful spring walks.

We went to medical school together. We dissected bodies together. We learned so many things together. We had our share of failures too. Remember that one time when the biochemistry teacher asked me that question and I had no clue she was even talking to me. You were there, all this while. Do you also remember that time when I jumped over the walls of my hostel so that I could go out for tea at 4 am with my friends? Do you remember how I landed on some thorny bushes and ended up hurting myself and crying? You helped me wipe my tears.

Then we went on to do post graduation and that is when you started distancing yourself from me? It was all still the same. I was still studying, going for dates, eating my heart out and partying when I felt like. Then what happened SSCs? Why did you slowly move away? Did I hurt you in some irreparable way?

Once I got married and had my baby, you completely broke off all relationships with me. You did not even want to look at me. You are still all around me. You are still everywhere I go. I have tried to come close to you so many times but you just did not want to be with me. You just did not want to fit like a glove again.

I miss you. I miss you a lot and I pray to God every day for you to come back into my life. Although I do not actively do anything about it, Lord knows that I would love to have you back. Now, you are just lying in my cupboards and my suitcases with some of your tags also still on, staring at me, looking me with disappointment and maybe disgust too. Oh my Small Sized Clothes, will you ever fit me again?

I would like to thank Mohita for introducing me. You can read her post here http://mommaloveskabir.blogspot.in
I would also like to introduce my fellow blogger Shruti. You can read her wonderful post on the prompt here https://fastnfeminist.wordpress.com/.

Letters of love- To my parents

I am thrilled to be participating in a five day “LOL-a-thon” organized by “The Momsteins”. Join us to read some wonderful letters written by 26 cool bloggers. Stay around to read some amazing letters coming up.

Today’s prompt is “letters of love- to my parents”

Dear Ama and Ba,

These are the terms used for parents in our dialect in my village of Tholang in Lahaul and Spiti in Himachal Pradesh. I am sure many of you might not even have heard of the names of these places. I do not blame you. This is one of the remotest areas of Himachal, which is inaccessible for about 5-6 months of the year due to snowfall on Rohtang Pass.

So my dearest Ama and Ba,

Let me first begin this letter by saying that I love you a lot. I know I do not say it very often but I mean it from the farthest and the deepest corner of my heart (kinda the Apex beat, showing off my medical knowledge all over again). My love and respect for you both are unmeasurable. Yes, I sometimes scream at you and maybe even scold you but Lord almighty knows that you are two of my favorite human beings on this earth and no matter what I do in my life, I will never be able to repay all that you have done for us.

Ama, you carried me in your womb for nine months and continued doing all the hard labor involved in the fields, tending to the cattle at home, cooking for the whole family and cleaning up behind them. You brought firewood from the forests to keep the family warm. You brought water from the village tap to keep everyone’s thirst and hunger at bay. Despite everything, you toiled on but you kept me warm and safe in your womb all this while. You birthed me. You brought me into this world. I am here because of you.

Ba, you gave up your entire life in providing for my brother and me. First, it was by caring for Ama, then providing for us financially and now that we are both grown up and settled in our respective worlds, you are still providing prayers and love for us. I was, I am and I will forever be indebted to you. I am not ashamed to tell the world that you left your once favorite things “alcohol and smoke” for our sake. You quit your chronic habits because Ama asked you to. From having packs of it every day to not even touching it, you have come a very long way. It takes courage and a very strong willpower to give up such habits overnight. I am so proud of you.

After I was born, you sent me away to Kullu, a bigger city as compared to our village so that I could get a good education and a brighter future. You sent your two and a half-year-old child away from you. I cannot even imagine the kind of pain that you must have felt when you were asked to separate from me. (Or were you happy and relieved, as you must have got some peace?). Now that I am a mother myself, I know how much it hurts to go away from that little piece of your heart. You just sent me away from you both forever. So that I have access to all those facilities which you both did not have and which other children of my generation had.

I am what I am today because of that one decision of yours. Yes, the aunts and uncles who eventually brought me up also have a major role to play in my life but I will save those emotions for another letter. I owe my life to you, in all senses. Pardon me if I sound like a narcissist, but I like to believe that I am today a confident, a loving and a caring person and an independent woman (maybe not financially right now), all and only because of you both.

You gave me one life by bringing me into this world on 20th August and then another one when you decided to send me away so that I become what I am today. I do not know how I would have turned out to be if I had stayed back in our village. But there is one thing I am very sure of; I turned out just fine away from you as well.

I would like to thank Mohita for introducing me. You can read her post here http://mommaloveskabir.blogspot.in
I would also like to introduce my fellow blogger Shruti. You can read her wonderful post on the prompt here https://fastnfeminist.wordpress.com/.

Year 2018 Resolutions

Oh that time of the year again, when some of us make this list of promises and resolutions only to be broken in a few weeks or maybe months if we are strong-willed. I am not lying when I say that I have never ever made New Year resolutions till date, not because I never needed to but because I knew I would never be able to live up to it. I know myself well that ways. I know I do not have the willpower to say no to hot steaming gulab jamuns when I have resolved to lose weight. So, you know, I might as well not even make them.

This year is different. I feel like making some resolutions for myself. Is it because I now have a blog and I wanted to write about it? Is it because I now have a daughter and I want to set up some examples for her? Is it because a lot of mom bloggers are doing it? Well, I am not sure about the exact reason and I think it is important that that is not where the focus should be. What is important is that I have decided to do something like this and I am keeping my fingers crossed that I am able to fulfill most of them. So here it goes.

  1. Contact one old friend every month with whom I have not talked in months or in years. Life happened to both of us or we had a fight or misunderstanding. I have a long list of such “friends” with whom I was best friends at one point in time and used to talk almost every single day but now we are worse than strangers. I have put the word friends in inverted commas because deep down I still consider them my friend but after this one effort that I intend to make this year, if they do not wish to continue what we had, it shall be a permanent goodbye. I wish to start this by doing it every month but with the list circulating in my head, I might have to do it every two weeks too.
  2. Do one good deed every month. I have not exactly thought of how I will be doing this but I am sure I will get ample opportunities as time passes. I just have to be ready to grab them at the right moment. If given a chance, I would be happy to change this too from “once a month” to “once a fortnight or week”. I do not want to start with very far-fetched dreams because it is better to be practical in the beginning itself.
  3. Drink more water every day. Yes, of course, I want to lose weight, but going to the gym is not my cup of tea. I have tried going for evening walks. I even downloaded an app to measure the distance walked every day. Then grocery shopping, Meera’s shopping, laziness, evening get together, menstrual cycles, north India winters etc. happened. The list of excuses is endless and that poor app got neglected on my phone and one day finally got uninstalled. Drinking water seems to be a more practical idea. It serves multiple purposes of keeping the gastrointestinal system and excretory system clean. There are options of warm water in winters and icy drinks in summers. I do not even need to step out of the house to do so. It is perfect for someone like me.
  4. Fast once a month- this is not going to be done with the intention of losing weight but just to detoxify me. I won’t be making resolutions of not eating sweets and chocolates and ice creams because that would be a big joke. I have zero willpower when it comes to sweets. So just to compensate, I shall give my stomach some much-needed rest.
  5. Oil my hair every week. I have these phases when sometimes I oil my hair twice or thrice in a week and times when I forget where my hair oil bottle is. Yes, I know I am weird. I am an all or none person. There is no “in between” for me.
  6. Wear sarees at least twice a month. I love wearing sarees and I have a decent collection that I can show off. Some of you might even remember that I participated in the #8sareesinoctober challenge conducted by @sareesandstories. The only problem is I keep waiting for occasions to wear them, which come very rarely. Most of my friends are married and those who are not are either not getting married or are already married but did not bother to invite me. (BTW, these are some of the “friends” I was talking about in my first resolution.) Hence I have resolved not to wait for occasions and to wear them when I feel like. This could be for a temple visit, or for grocery shopping. Let the world call me overdressed!
  7. Slow down. Miraya is never going to be this small ever again. She will not be an eighteen-month-old toddler ever again. Let her be the mini hurricane she is. It is ok if someone else’s child of the same age is building huge towers with blocks or putting smaller straws through bigger straws, and all that my kid does is destroy the tower you built or chew those straws. It is ok. There are many things that my kid can do which the others cannot. It is not a competition. She is a smart, healthy and a happy kid. And that is all that actually matters.
  8. Take at least one trip with just your friend or friends this year. This has been on my to-do list ever since I got pregnant. I have done many such trips before I got these responsibilities for myself. I actually miss those days of freedom. Now that Miraya is a little older, I have to do something like that again. At least once, if not more.
  9. Create something. I have a few ideas in my head for this. Some DIYs, some business ideas, some blog ideas etc. Let us see how many of these am I actually able to fulfill. You might just see lots of updates on Instagram soon.
  10. Lastly, use your DSLR more often. So husband gifted me a camera in 2011, which hasn’t been used as much as it should have been. So this year, I have resolved to learn some photography and use that camera. I shall try and upload at least one picture a month from that camera and hope to get an honest opinion from all of you.

If you managed to reach till here, thank you so much for tolerating with my “not so fancy” resolutions. I just needed to pen down “the banter in my head”.